A New Heart, Broken
by N.Minh.T.H
Summary: To never form attachments. To have no heart. This is the number one rule of the Bookman code. It can not be broken. The young Bookman in training had memorized and craved this rule into his genius brain. And yet, the meeting with one man had made Bookman Jr. forget all his codes and break the most important rule of all. Lucky, Shonen Ai, yaoi, rated T for Tyki's hotness


**Warnings:** BL(boylove)/yaoi/shonen ai

**Pairings:** _(main)_ Lucky/TykixLavi, might add others as the story progresses

**Disclaimer:** I DO **NOT** OWN D-GRAY MAN! I DO **NOT** OWN ANYTHING IN THIS STORY OTHER THAN THE PLOT AND WRITING ITSELF!

Why did it hurt so much? Why?

Where did this pain come from?

His heart, oh how it ached as he held that limp body.

Limp, cold, and never-moving. _Dead_. The word that was forbidden to the heart.

_Dead_. And it was all because of him. Because of _him_ that person was gone forever.

They would never cross the battle fields together again.

They would never again exchange a number of numb insults. Calling back and forth with words that they accustomed to each other and only each other.

He never expected it to hurt this much. He never imagined the pain it would bring to be this strong. So defined. So agonizing.

He screamed.

Because it hurt. Yes, it hurt very much.

His voice echoed off the heavens but no amount was enough. He screamed his whole heart out. He screamed out the object that was denied from him.

His heart.

To never form attachments. To never form bonds. To deceive. To receive, yet to never give. To have no heart.

This was, and still is, the number one rule of the Bookman code. It can not be broken, for if it is then you are no Bookman. If it is broken then you must ignore it and go on, else leave behind your obligation and never look back.

But Lavi had broken this rule too many times already. Way too many times. Yet each time he was able to fend it off, the way a Bookman must.

Like,

When Kanda first arrived into his life, Lavi saw him as the test subject who was part of the second exorcist plan and he saw Lavi as the idiot rabbit that had a death wish.

When Lenalee first skipped into his zone of sight, she was only the strong willed pretty girl who loved her family and he was the idiot rabbit who chased skirts with a weird sense of humor.

When Allen was first introduced to him, he was seen as something new to record, The Destroyer of Time, and Lavi was seen as the overly energetic man who acted like a five year old boy on a sugar rush.

But as time passed, they each left a bigger imprint on Lavi than he wanted them too. He felt the 'unnecessary' attachments that he should have never felt.

Kanda became that distant friend who was close enough to protect Lavi even if it meant his life was on the line.

Lenalee became the girl in the center of his heart, more than a friend, less than lover, not exactly a sister.

Allen became that friend who Lavi could depend on when he needed to no matter what.

Still, Lavi, he was able to defend himself from these feelings. Even though he could not throw away these emotions, he was able to confine them. He trapped them in a small box then trapped the box as well. They had no way out. No escape.

But then _he_ came along.

Tall, dark, and handsome. The perfect man. His status was of that of a Lord's. His money was spilling out from his pockets. His personality, split in half. His white side, playful and willing; carefree yet serious when needed. His black side, demented and terrifying; evil was just a level below his.

He was the enemy.

He was Tyki Mikk.

It was a sick _sick_ joke. Yet the joke was determined to be played. So it happened. The two _stupid_ split personality people who were on different sides of the war decided to fall for one another, even after they knew and considered the consequences. They were very _stupid_ indeed.

A single meeting outside of work and both of their worlds came crashing down. A book store. Yes, a single meeting at a book store led to multiple meetings anywhere else. Anywhere was fine with them, as long as they were together, it mattered not where they were. _Except_ the battlefield.

On the battlefield everything was different. They were supposedly enemies. They supposedly hated each other. They supposedly wanted to crush each other's existence to the point where there was none left, not even dust to blow away. But only supposedly.

The feelings were already carved into their beings by then. The love for one another had already begun. There was no going back. There was nothing that could change how they felt about the other.

Bookman Jr. was chained down by Lavi. Tyki Mikk was only another victim of his. And Lavi? Lavi was a prisoner to Love who had binded the young soul to the tanned man of whom he himself had imprisoned.

But even though Lavi was a prisoner for Love, he also is a slave for duty.

Lavi's job will forever be fulfilled, no matter what it is or even the consequences, it _will_ be done.

So even when Bookman and Bookman Jr. were both forced to fight in this war to save their lives—despite that they are neutral—they both still fought. They fought to save themselves. They fought to save history. And Lavi, he fought against his heart.

Out of all the things Lavi battled and all the experience he gain through those battles, it still wasn't enough. He couldn't win against his heart. Every time his heart became his enemy, Lavi would waiver, and the battle became lost. Bookman scowled him yet that was never enough.

But today, Lavi finally won. Lavi killed his heart and the man who kept it. Lavi became a full Bookman.

His heart had finally died. Tyki Mikk also died at his hands.

Tyki Mikk had finally died and all because of Lavi.

It was Lavi's Fault.

Why is it then when Lavi finally won against himself that it hurt so much.

Oh, the pain was just unbearable.

So Lavi screamed.

Because it hurt. Yes, it hurt very much.

His voice echoed off the heavens but no amount was enough. He screamed his whole heart out. He screamed out the object that was denied from him.

His heart.

Oh, but his heart was dead.

And so was the man he loved.

**(A/N) **as for the name spellings, I go by Lavi, Lenalee, Allen, Tyki, and so on. I know that there are other ways to spell their names (like ravi/rabi/labi/ect or rinari/lenalee/linali/ect and so on) but _technically_, **these** ways are the correct ones (Lavi/Lenalee/the-ones-i-mentioned-earlier). The reason is because Asians who do not speak English often have an accent _when_ speaking english. So L's sound like R's and V's sound like B's and so on. _Also_, if you are reading an English translated manga online or what not, and it translates it like rabi or something, that is because the Japanese language does not have the same letters/characters to recreate the English words. I hope this helps you understand **why** i chose to use these versions of the names.

Also, PLEASE REVIEW! please and thank you for reading!


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